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You are Here: Home > Love Stories > My First Love > Emptiness in my Heart



Emptiness in my Heart
by Maige
I don't believe in love at first sight or either it is crazy to be in love, or love is blind. But I have idealism that I want my first boyfriend to be my husband.
I want to experience of being a working student. I am just curious of what life would be of being in school and working in a fastfood. Being a working student is really really hard, but guys I survived the 6 months. 3 weeks left in my contract, I met this guy.
It was not love at first sight but I felt he’s the one I’m waiting. Maybe I thought that he’s the guy who can ease the emptiness in my heart. As the days passed, we became close to each other. My contract had finished and has been busy to think about and took care of my graduation. After grad, I decided to take a vacation. 3 months passed, and then I’ve started to look a job. After a couple of weeks, I found a job. These are the things that kept me busy. Then, I remembered him. I realized that we are not close anymore. I tried to keep in touch with him. We see each other at least once in a year. We exchange text messages at least in a quarter. Five years passed but still we had not crossed the boundaries of our friendship.
At present, he is in abroad, at least we have communication (thanks to the high tech things), sad to say, I'm always the first one who initiate our communication (always & forever). I fed up and tired of waiting (in the first place, he didn’t tell me that I should wait for him).
I gave up.
Still, I want to patch up the things we should be. I miss the way we were before.
But there are things that no matter how you push through, no matter how you want to back again,
It’s just the way it is…
Maybe he’s right, it’s time to accept, to let go, move on and get a life without him.

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